It Is All Gay

It’s been a while since my last and only post, however, I promise to update more often. Like every other gay guy, I’ve also fallen for the straight guy. He’s a great friend with such amazing qualities. He’s the guy that I would want to spend my life with. However, he is straight, but somewhere deep down I have a feeling that he just might be gay. I know, I know! We must all think the same thing, but there are times when he does things or says things that just make it seem likely. I like him and I can admit it, but if in the end it turns out he’s straight, I’d still wish him the best.

Now on to some shallow aspects of my life. It seems like we all want that male model body, cut muscles and rippling abs, but does the average guy have that? I know I don’t look like that. Actually, I have more to love. Which gets me to my next point. I don’t feel comfortable in the body I have, and I know that it’s up to me to do something about it. I enrolled in a gym and went for a while, which helped me. I was losing weight, I was sleeping better at night, and I was somewhat more self confident. Unfortunately, I hit a small bump in my plans and I haven’t worked out lately. Everyday I wake up saying that today will be the day my life will begin to change. I will eventually look like I want to, and I will be able to get out of the closet and live a happier life.

So what advice can you give me? Any comments or suggestions?

My name is irrelevant, but my story is of more importance. I’m a 23 year old guy who happens to be gay. I’m out to my sister, brother, and a few friends. I have not told my parents that I’m gay and I’m not sure when I’ll be able to tell them. I was raised in a Christian home and even though I stopped going to church about a year ago, my parents still attend.

I’ve known I was gay since a very young age. I always admired boys instead of girls and there was never any attraction towards girls as I grew up. I was always fascinated and attracted to men. Many people say being gay is a choice, but I’ve never had the option to decide that I liked men, it’s always been a natural thing to me.

I moved away from home a couple of months ago to a bigger city, hoping that somehow living as a gay man would be easier. My life has been almost the same as it was before, however, I now buy gay-themed books and watch gay films (I’m not talking about porn) without having to worry about getting caught.

I’m not the ideal version of a gay man. I don’t have a great sense of fashion nor do I have a perfect body like a stereotypical gay man. However, I have decided to work on myself both inside and out. I need to get in shape and appreciate myself some more. I’m willing to say that I don’t have much self confidence but it is something I’m working on.

Hopefully with this blog I’ll be able to freely express myself without worrying about anyone finding out of who I truly am. I really hope that one day soon, I’ll be able to walk out of the closet with confidence and live a happy life.